"Uthna nahi hai aapko?"

I voiced out the question, despite the huskiness of my voice from sleep.

He just hummed.

His hands tightened a little further around my waist.

I was able to feel-

the warmth despite the fabric.

My fingers paused just for a second-

which were on his shirt button,

Just below the collar.

The room was cold, maybe due to the moisture the wind carried outside.

But still it felt hot here despite the fan humming to its full efficiency.

I laid above him.

We laid their for almost an hour or so

Or maybe more-

I don't know.

With him I don't care about the time.

Every deadline goes quiet suddenly

Even for some time.

Sukoon,

I never knew,

It would be this, until now-

I always thought it was about wishes.

But it was this simple.

I, him, moon and the darkness

and the quiet of the home.

I rolled the button with my finger.

My bangles chimed with the moment.

I was able to feel his eyes on me,

unblinking.

Despite the barrier of darkness.

I pressed my palm on his chest.

It felt warm beneath my cold hand.

My hands were cold-

But his chest felt warm.

"Shaant"

I whispered.

I was able to feel the sharp intake of breath he took.

I looked at him.

He turned his gaze to the moon.

I pressed my ear to his chest.

It was still the same.

Restless.

Just like the wind outside.

He looked at me.

"Ek baat puche?"

I looked up, the strand flicked in front of my eyes.

But I cared less.

Something was in his mind.

"Nahi bolenge toh nahi puchenge kya?"

His fingers brushed lightly on my cheek as he adjusted the strand behind my ear.

"Jo apne bola tha, I care for you-

wo sach tha kya?"

I deadpanned.

"Nahi, jooth tha khush, ab uth jaaiye. Der hogayi hai, kaam hai-par pehle kuch kha lete hain chalke der hogayi hai."

But I laid back after saying that,

"Like as in care wala care."

I pressed my nails into his arms intentionally.

"Nahi toh aur kitne tarah ka care hota hai ji."

He chuckled lightly,

with that his grip on my waist loosened.

My feet went cold-

Maybe it was the cool breeze

Or the fan.

But neither of us moved.

"Uthna nahi hai aapko?"

He repeated the same question,

which I had asked earlier.

I hummed.

My gaze was fixed on the redness of the moon.

Acha lag raha hai

Finally I tried to get up,

Regardless of my resistant thoughts.

But my feet got tangled in the blanket.

Before I could think-

My balance faltered, and my lips landed straight on the side of his neck.

I almost jumped out of the bed.

"Khana banana hai."

And ran out of the room.

I was about to lose my balance again.

Due to the cartons scattered all around.

Pagal hoon mai.

His voice came from behind.

"Aree-"

But I snapped the door shut, and finally released a breath, with that I was about to move to the kitchen, only to realise there was no LPG connection.

I sat on the sofa that was there in the middle of the hall.

Between all the stuff.

I looked at them-one box to another and then another.

Mujhe hi karna padega ye toh subha duty chale jaayenge.

He Bhagwaan!

I gulped-as I looked at the furniture-

The table.

I dropped my head on the sofa.

Kaha fas gayi.

I carned my neck to look at the window-

One thing was good.

There were so many windows.

But at the next second my eyes widened,

as I noticed a lizard,

and before I could think.

I scrambled from the sofa,

Still looking at that lizard-

and almost ran inside.

The floor felt cold, beneath my feet.

Only to stumble upon him.

🌷

God.

My throat bobbed, as I felt her warmth-

from the remnants of sleep.

The cold of the water from the shower.

Suddenly it felt warm again.

The way her warm breath fanned on my neck.

Harsh. Nervous.

Her payals chimed as she shifted slightly.

Her frame pressed softly against mine.

The freshness of the shower gel was replaced by our scent once again.

First that kiss,

No, don't think about that.

I was about to say something.

But suddenly she shrieked.

"Chipkali"

She almost pushed me towards the window,

pointing towards it.

"Aapko pehle bataana tha na yahaan keede makode saath rehne waale hain, bina rent ke."

She almost ranted, glaring at that lizard or should I say the nervous stare.

Suddenly the lizard moved a little, and she almost ran into me.

"Mummy"

I pressed my lips so hard, to control the laugh bubbling inside me.

She dug her nails into my shirt.

The way her hair created a barrier between her closed lashes.

My laugh faded in the background-

In front of the redness of her cheeks.

From sleep and part fear.

I glanced at her knuckles.

"Chodengi toh jaaunga na."

Her brows furrowed.

"Maine kaha pakda hai."

I pointed towards the direction of her hand.

She immediately released it looking down.

To be honest,

Bahut sundar lag rahi thi aaj wo,

Us laal chaand se bhi zyada,

Jo maine dekha tha.

The messy bun,

The bindi on her forehead.

The way locks fell on her eyes-

The vermillion-

Aur tab samajh aaya sukoon chaand mein hi tha.

I cleared my throat,

as I tore my gaze away from her.

Only to realize that the lizard was gone.

But her gaze was still struck on the ground.

"Gayi chipkali"

She craned her neck to look at me.

Huh?

I leaned in a little-

Just enough to make her land on Earth, from God knows what dream.

"Chipkali gayi Shriya ji."

She shivered just slightly-

That's when I realised how close we were.

But still I was able to feel the cold floor.

She immediately stepped back,

walking towards the sofa.

Her payals chimed a little too loudly in the dark.

My hands went to the switchboard as I followed her.

"Bina light on kare khana kaisa banaya aapne?"

I sat beside her.

The leather dipped slightly beneath me.

"Baat mat kariye aap."

She fixed her gaze on the wall in front of her.

I chucked, exactly knowing why?

Par maza toh es gusee mein hi hai.

"Bana liya khana?"

I continued further.

Enjoying it a little too much.

She glared at me.

Feisty much.

"Haan jaaiye kha lijiye, do chaar cockroach mile the toh uski sabzi banaai hai."

The laugh finally escaped my lips.

She pinched my arm and got up.

Her hands worked with the cartons as she mumbled to herself, opening them one by one.

"Hasne ko dedo bas koi kaam toh karwana hai nahi, biwi toh hai hi akele karegi, hai na ab toh shaadi ho hi gayi hai...."

O how much I enjoyed it.

I shook my head and held the crockery in my hand.

"Haan ab kyun kar rahe hain jaaiye hasiye baith ke biwi toh aa hi gayi hai kaam karne ke liye ab."

With that she walked to the kitchen.

and started washing the tiles.

I walked to the other side of the kitchen-

I rolled the sleeves.

But just as I was about to pick up the scrubber, her voice interrupted.

"Kal aapko duty nahi jana hai?"

🌷

My hands paused on the tiles mid scrub.

The smell of detergent lingered in the space,

as I noticed, he was also going to scrub the tiles on the other side.

I was just saying it.

I somewhere knew he was teasing me.

But still maybe,

So I asked him.

"Jana toh hai."

I started working again,

The clink of my bangles echoed again, along with the soft scratches of scrubber on the tiles.

As I finally wiped it off clean.

"Toh phir rest kariye, I will bring something to eat."

I continued my work, humming softly to myself.

It was normal, again.

But I was able to feel his gaze on me.

As I reached beside him.

My hands worked to scrub the tiles on the other side.

Finally I asked.

"Kya?"

He shook his head at first and passed me the jug of water.

"Srif akele aap ka toh kaam nahi, hum saath mein rahenge yahaan."

I looked at him-as my fingers brushed his hand lightly.

The water slid on to his hand as I took the jug from him.

"Aree par hume koi kaam nahi hai hum toh ghar par hi rahenge kal na-"

He cut me off mid sentence.

I poured the water, he wiped the tiles-dry walking alongside.

"Kisne kaha aapko kaam nahi hai, aap ko job karni hai na, toh yahaan aap exam preparation kar sakti hain aage."

I slowed my hands while listening to him.

He brought the utensils into the kitchen.

I wiped the cabinets-dusting them.

His voice got lost in the clatter of the utensils.

"I saw your academic records, while looking for the documents, you have already done your masters in English honours, why don't you think for PhD."

I paused.

Finally looking at him.

"Par-"

"Par kya, akele bore ho jaayengi yahaan, why are you wasting your potential, you already know my job right-it's uncertain."

I nodded in understanding-as I spread the newspapers on the cabinet meticulously.

"Rest it's your choice, I am just sharing my opinion."

He forwarded me the utensils.

I placed them one by one-

In no time,

The kitchen really started looking like a kitchen.

I skimmed over it.

as we finally settled the gas stove on the slab.

Each container was according to my choice.

Everything-it was according to me.

With that we finally collapsed on to the sofa.

With the half open container of ladoos from home.

"Baaki kal karenge, aap LPG connection ka dekh lena."

He hummed.

The faint aroma of ghee and cardamom wafted in the air as I bit on to the sweet.

He was asleep-again.

Beside me.

It was already mid-night.

PHD?

Yes.

But-

I bit on to the sweet again-

The flour melted into my mouth-

Like a sweetness-

of a home.

Kal dekhi jaayegi.

To be continued.

Unedited.